Note to Readers: A reader friendly blog post on this subject can be found at this link.

REVENGE IS PERMISSIBLE BUT NOT PROFITABLE
In most cultures it is permissible, even encouraged, to seek revenge for harms done. This is not the case for God’s kingdom where vengeance is permissible but not profitable. Here is what the bible says in 1 Corinthians 10:23-24  in three different bible versions:

All things are permitted, but not all things are of benefit. All things are permitted, but not all things build [people] up. 24 No one is to seek his own [advantage,] but rather that of his neighbor. NASB

“I have the right to do anything,” you say—but not everything is beneficial. “I have the right to do anything”—but not everything is constructive.  NIV

All things are lawful [that is, morally legitimate, permissible], but not all things are beneficial or advantageous. All things are lawful, but not all things are constructive [to character] and edifying [to spiritual life. Amplified Bible

All three bible versions disagree with the permissions that all cultures give to people who feel a need to revenge wrongs done to them, to their family, to a group to which they belong, or to their nation. Those legal rights make this scripture easy to ignore. If a culture society says I am free to seek vengeance, retribution and reparations for any offense I may have suffered, why not do it? If someone harms me or steals from me, why should I be the one to suffer while the perpetrator is allowed to avoid the consequences?

The answers to these questions are clear: You are free to seek revenge but if you do it for your own satisfaction with no view in mind for the opportunity to build someone (not necessarily the perpetrator) up, you are using your freedom for the wrong reasons (i.e. your satisfaction) — not for the benefit of your neighbor. In this case, you put your interests ahead of possible benefits to others. More to the point, you put your own interests ahead of God’s word.

When you use the freedom to seek vengeance that your culture offers, your culture will not judge you, but God will judge your because you because you have put cultural laws ahead of God’s spiritual laws. Here is what God’s spiritual laws say about every situation:

• Do what builds people up.
• Do what is beneficial and constructive for others.
• Do not seek your own advantage.
• Do whatever you can do to create an advantage for your neighbor.

These attitudes and practices fulfill God’s command to love your neighbor. Choosing to use the permission your culture gives you to seek revenge is evidence that you do not have God’s laws written on your heart is not consistent with Godly love and is not what God means by sacrificial love. Sacrificial love requires that you sacrifice the legal, cultural, religious rights you have in favor of constructive advantages for your neighbor.

Yes you are free to seek revenge, but when you do, you miss an opportunity to make the world a little bit better for someone else. You may never see when, where and how the world becomes better, but needing to see the results of is a very selfish need. We sacrifice that desire to know that we have made a difference in the world when we restrain ourselves from seeking revenge  because we trust that someone (i.e. a neighbor) will benefit from our restraint.

The natural, human response to hurts, offenses, disappointments and betrayals is to strike back passively or overtly. These responses are not what the bible teaches, These responses are not what Jesus taught or did in response to his tribulations.

NEED FOR REVENGE IS EVIDENCE OF UNFORGIVENESS
The need to punish someone with revenge is clear evidence of unforgiveness. Forgiveness, on the other hand, is evidence of trust that God will avenge wrongdoing with justice without involvement of the one who has been wronged. God sees unforgiveness as evil as we see in these scriptures:

• Ephesians 4:31-32 “Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander, as well as all types of evil behavior. Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another…”
• Hebrews 12:15 “Looking carefully lest anyone fall short of the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up cause trouble, and by this many become defiled.”

These scriptures directly equate unforgiveness (bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, slander) with “evil behavior.”  They contrast unforgiveness with the virtues of kindness, tenderheartedness, and forgiveness that are evidence of neighborly love.

See this link for more about forgiveness. See this link for more about justice.

BLESS  YOUR ENEMIES — DO NOT CURSE THEM
Gossip is a common human practice that is permissible in all cultures and even require in some cultures but is never constructive. The ultimate purpose of gossip is to tear down our enemies — not to build them up. Tearing down others is one way that weak people build themselves up in their own eyes and in the eyes of others.

Some people might be able to restrain themselves from overt vengeance when they are hurt, offended, disappointed and betrayed. They may not, however, be able to restrain themselves from gossiping with third parties about things done to them. Gossipers are out of control. Here are a few key facts about gossip:

• Gossip is vengeance by another name.
• Gossip may seem benign, but the intent of gossip is to tear people down — not build them up.
• Smooth words do not disguise the evil intent of gossip.
• Gossip causes more trouble by dividing friends.
• Gossip is the evil opposite of blessing: gossip is curse.

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We bless someone when we say and do things to build them up in their own eyes and in the eyes of others. We bless them when we forgive them.